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Writer's pictureMeltem Bozçal

Healthy Borders


As relationships develop, life gradually becomes complicated. We tend to have a great partnership with people who are attracted to us, and our respect for them forces us to rely on their judgment. Although our lives seem to come together so softly, the line that separates them cannot be seen as clearly as before, but we remain separate entities. To ignore these obstacles is to sacrifice independence.

Regardless of the lives of others, we have the freedom to respect our existence, create emotional and physical boundaries, explore our interests and talents, and refuse to agree not to participate in every idea and situation. The protection of healthy borders is a matter of recognizing our principles and the point where our loved ones and peers no longer coincide.

Mankind must fight mercilessly with the desire to follow the crowd. Naturally, we want to be loved, embraced and admired, and it is often seen that the easiest way to get approval is to consider ourselves together with others. When we assume that our standards are the same as those close to us without examining our own intentions, we are also hurting ourselves. The obstacles that exist between us remind us that our paths in life will be unique, and that each should accept that "me" and "we" can coexist in peace. Our reactions, loved ones and dislikes, our love, our goals and our dreams may or may not be aligned with others, but we should not expect others to understand what we love or feel obliged to embrace what they love.

When you learn to define yourself as a separate individual emotionally and intellectually, you will appreciate your autonomy. But even if you enjoy communities that connect you to others and give you a sense of belonging, your essence ultimately comes from your own soul.

The healthy borders to your limits give you the freedom to continue your development apart from others, and generally you do not need the approval of others you are looking for. Others will continue to play a role in your presence in any case, but your unnecessary redirects and relationships will ultimately be perfectly balanced and matched.

Stay with love!


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